im really overwhelmed right now with all things i need to do. i need to pack a carry on, all my luggage, my gifts for the family need to be put together, i need to organize everything... its just chaos in my head right now.. im not freakin out on the outside, my i feel like my stomach is literally tied in knots. this is going to be interesting... i have so much to do. uggggh!!!

3 sleeps

Im going to Europe in less than three days. I have Saturday and Sunday... I leave on Monday morning... Oh my goodness...

My God is a God who provides!!

Great way to start off the day... makes me laugh so hard that I can barely breathe!!!!

Today was a great little day... I spent it with Beckah and Lexi!!! It was fun.

Im leaving in a few days. Its now Friday, and I leave Monday!!!! Crazy! Time is going very fast. Im really looking forward to it. What a blessing.

You know what? Im learning that even though my life is so far from perfect, or simple, or easy, regarless of my own crap, God is still sovereign. And you sit there saying, "Uh, yeah.. obviously!" But, when I realize and remember that God is sovereign, I remember he knows it all... what I struggle with, my fears, my emotions, the outcome of every situation... He is good, always good. He proves to be faithful over and over. As I focus my attention to seeing his goodness and his faithfulness in everything, I have found myself so much more compassionate and thankful. Gods doing a new work in me, and though its far from over, Im thankful that I am able to be humbled to be used by his grace for his glory. What an absolutely amazing blessing to be used by God. And how incredible selfish and foolish to pursue my own plans... All I want, and I mean this with everything in me, is for God to complete the work he has started in me and to use everything I am for his Kingdom. . . to live my life in a way that glorifies who he is, to bless his name with my actions and with my words, to live a life of thankfulness and worship, to seek his face and live off his every word, to fulfill his call on my life and to be lead by his spirit. Im taking baby steps, one at a time, and though theyre small, they feel so big. Yet, at the same time, even though Ive grown and changed alot in the past few months, it has been hard, but not "hard". Ive had such grace from God... such freedom to forgive... freedom to love and open myself up... to learn and be taught... to teach.... to give... to experience... to grow...

"All of my life,
In every season
You are still God
And I have a reason to sing;
I have a reason to worship.

This is my prayer in the desert,
when that is in me feels dry.
And this is my prayer in my hunger and need,
My God is the God who provides.

And this is my prayer in the battle
When triumph is still on its way
I am a conquerer and co-heir with Christ
So firm on his promise I'll stand."

Things are a little crazy right now! I just wrote my History 12 Provincial after sleeping for three hours... and now I have four major essays to write and have handed in by Friday. I work full days Friday and Saturday, and I leave for the mainland on Sunday afternoon... Im in Holy Grounds Sunday morning ... and in between all this, I have to pack, and get ready for my trip. Im a little overwhelmed, and Im already missing everyone. It will be a good trip, but its coming too fast!!! Four days away... oh my goodness... Four days!

6 sleeps.

Its really hard for me to actually imagine myself leaving. I only have six more sleeps until I go... When I get to Hannover, Helena's family is having a family reunion for like three or four days, and I dont speak *any* German. I pray to the Almighty that they speak English, or Im miraculously able to speak German.

I was trying to find a terminal map of the airport in Seattle and Paris, so I could kind of figure out how to get from one gate to the next, but...well... I'll attach a picture of the Paris airport. Next to London Heathrow, its the busiest airport in Europe. "The three terminals are connected by free shuttle buses and handle over 200,000 passengers daily." No big deal right.... I'll be fine.

sandlios and sockinos

What is it with people that make them think its okay to wear socks with sandals? Not only is this directly contrary to the purpose of sandals, its down right friggen atrocious.

Upon being paged this afternoon by speedy fingers Joanne, I made my way from downstairs, all the way to the front desk to take in a guest for a service... I'm sure my response was obvious, and likely quite rude as well, but forgive me and try not to judge because this man.... AHEM... this man... was wearing a pair of decent looking shorts... classy, nonetheless. I walked toward him and looked this slightly overweight middle aged character up and down three or four times. My mouth may have hung open, but Im not sure. As I walked toward him, it clicked for me. "Im being paged because there's a guest. This is probably my guest." I kept walking toward him as I did a few solid blinks...

He was wearing a pair of thick socks with a tight stretchy band that came about half way up his shin. Joanne handed me his sheet of paper and I quickly skimmed over his information so I knew where to take him. "3:15 Sanddollar"... alright... three fifteen... sanddollar...PEDICURE!! WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Ew. I cant imagine what kind of feet this guy has hidden in his woolen socks!!!! Ech!!

There are so many things wrong with wearing socks and sandals. It just doesn't look good, and I dont understand the purpose of wearing both. Like, why not just wear your boxers over your jeans? Why not wear skiing gloves in the summer??

Pradas Spring 09 line ... socks and sandals. Tons and tons of socks and sandals. Apparently... a few men in our church family are not haute coutier!!!! Socks, and gladiator knee length sandals... wool socks and sandals with 4'' heels!!!! What kind of fool??? Good lord, and who spends money on this junk?????

I beg of you with sincerity of heart... please... please don't wear socks with your sandals, or socks with your flip flops, or socks with your CROCS!!! Wear socks with your running shoes... when your JOGGING. that's it!!! Ever!!!!! Another tangent for next time.

im just on my way to work - but i wanted to quickly post this.

im so overwhelmed by gods faithfulness. even when im a total failure, hes faithful. hes protected me, hes given me strength... joy... the ability to walk in unbelievable grace.. to really trust him with all that i am and all that i have. ive been praying a blessing over me and my family and church family and friends... protection also, and just since then ... gods been proving more and more faithful. it astounds me. hes so good. he is just so stinken amazing. ppl always say i just want you god, i just want what you have for me.... and im guilty of this too... saying it without understanding that entirely... and i probably still dont entirely, but more than anything else, i just want what he has for me.. to be lead in the ways he has for me... its all i want. its what im striving for... and its not frustrating, its enjoyable and rewarding to know that gods got me on his heart and my best interest is very important to him... realizing what it means to be a daughter of the king... hhhhh.... god, youre just so good.